Two Types of Scents

Not long ago, Mr. Schoeni said goodbye to me at my home. Now, unprepared and unwillingly, I can only see him again and recall our acquaintance through my memory. To me, it was as if it were only yesterday.

We had known each other for years. My English isn't very good, neither was his Chinese. Apart from translators, our communication relied on mutual admiration. Sometimes I really upset him! Once, a friend of his commissioned me to do a painting. Mr. Schoeni not only explained the requirement over and over again on the phone, but afterwards he also came from Hong Kong to demonstrate, on a bed, which I use for my models, the pose that was required for his friend's painting.

Yet when I painted the picture, I did not like the pose his friend required. So I completed the order according to my own taste.

When I handed over the painting, I knew that I had made him angry, but he chose not to express it out of politeness.

Yet sometimes I made him happy!

I love to play and am not an artist who is prone to working himself to death. Though my paintings usually turn out well, the end product disguises an often arduous labour. Once Mr. Schoeni came to see a few of my paintings. When he left, he scribbled on the bonnet of my car, which was covered in dust, "Hello XX". He was obviously delighted that it had been a long time since I had set foot outside my studio.

Mr. Schoeni regularly visited Beijing and was a regular guest in the homes of those whom he loved. Each time he left my home, he left behind the scent of a man.

I seldom use perfume, nor can I tell the difference between cool water and colonge. Yet every time after he departed I would detect the scent of lilac.

Strangely, when I was just over forty, all my friends who were familiar with 'The Book of Changes'¹ said there would be "peach blossoms in my life", meaning that I would be prone to having affairs. To me, peach blossoms are outstanding flowers. Although they are common, they are still elegant flowers. My peach blossom matches perfectly with Mr. Schoeni's scent - in China lilacs are known as an object of affection. Whilst peach blossoms symbolise indiscriminate love, they are more intimate than the affectionate lilac. The two flowers have very different scents, but both share the same sadness and allure.

I am really unwilling to meet Mr. Schoeni through memory alone, and cannot accept that what happened just yesterday has to become part of the irreversible past. Yet I am more than willing to preserve the special scent that belonged to a man of such character. With sincere love, I shall preserve and treasure these two types of scent that belonged to Manfred Schoeni and I.

Xia Xing
June, 2004


¹   Also known as Yiology and the "I-Ching."